Etiquette
Whenever members of a civilized species gather they follow a certain set of rules for social interaction. This set of rules is known as etiquette or protocol and obviously differs from group to group (you might have noticed that conversation to elderly and wealthy grandparents requires a different bearing and vocabulary than meeting peers).
This guide is extra-detailed to be of help to our players on the autistic spectrum - if you feel underchallenged, good for you, that probably means that your character will live... A joke. Just a joke.
The more civilized the present representatives consider themselves, the more convoluted and extravagant said rules of etiquette become. For an uneducated character these are all but impossible to grasp intuitively and they are bound to embarrass themselves (which is the whole point of this - to identify outsiders right away).
I'm no expert on courtly mannerisms myself, so I'll settle for a rough outline that a well-educated middle-class character would be familiar with. (They have their analogies in real life, just in case you wondered.)
1) There's an order of precedency.
You(r character) may not be aware of it, but it is there. In general, the host is considered most important - unless there is someone present who outranks them by means of social standing. The tipping point is deliciously unclear.
Example: If you are a new Telvanni and meet Vivicah at the party of a Hlaalu council member, you are f*cked because either could legitimately be mad at you for greeting the other one first.
How to solve it the most elegantly:
- Find someone else to introduce you
- Linger nearby until one of them addresses you and then introduce yourself to them right away - then ask their permission to introduce yourself to their conversation partner. (Of course the question would be a formality if your social standing is high enough, but a polite formality)
- Wait until they are engaged in a conversation where the social order is clear
2) Formal introductions
The one who approaches a group of people immediately becomes a social debitor - he is expected to pay up as quickly as possible. One can lower this threshold by finding someone else to introduce him, which will be considered more polite than introducing yourself. Depending on how large the social gap between the newcomer and the present company is, it would be considered terribly rude to make one's presence known any more than by a polite cough every few minutes.
While introducing themselves, your character positions themselves within the social hierarchy by how they handle this.
Example (good): "I am Alric, son of Belric, Apprentice of the Mages' Guild, and my master Drinks-With-Nords has sent me with a letter for Keeper Beron - whom do I have the privilege of addressing?"
Example (bad): *While Vivicah is talking to Rahaen'fviel* "Who of you two ladies is more important?"
3) Being new
If someone joins a conversation they are at the bottom of the conversation hierarchy, no matter who the participants of the conversation were, because they already have interrupted. If your character's social standing is high enough to even it out, good for them - otherwise anything but listening and going along with the present conversation is considered pretty rude.
Example (bad): "And I've just conducted my research about -" "NICE DAY FOR FISHING, AIN'T IT?"
4) Quod licet Iovi non licet bovi
(What Vivec gets away with is not what the Guar is allowed to do)
Consider the rank and social standing of a character when judging their actions and ask yourself if it is appropriate to act like this among the characters around you. Would you kiss someone else's spouse? Tickle someone else's best friend? Insult someone else's enemy? The other person will assume that this is about them and not about your character.
5) Conversation leads
Who is leading the conversation when your character enters? Is this person more important than they?
Example: Is one of the wizards interviewing someone? If yes, is your character at least equally important? If yes, do they want to risk insulting their peer by interrupting? If no, they should shut up and go along.
6) Listen to what is said before you ask questions
Asking about something that was literally just said is terribly rude because it shows your conversation partner you haven't been paying attention and other things were more important than they are. You can save your character from that fate by scrolling up a few lines and taking the time to catch up with what has happened if you have lost track, or - if that is too fast for you - ask in group chat if it was just mentioned. (It's no less rude outside of RP, by the way.)
Having your character doing that too often will lead to the Telvanni wizards being pissed at them - seriously pissed. Those are used to their words being greedily inhaled by those less blessed with intelligence and wisdom, and if they notice that they are not appreciated then the best thing that can happen to your character is that they will ignore them henceforth.
7) Attention
Whom to ignore and whom to not ignore is a very important statement in terms of conversation. If your character has been asked a question by some noble and they ignore it to chat with their fellow apprentices, they are deliberately pissing off the noble. If they are brusquely walking away from a conversation, it is rude (characters will in general not take offense if their player knows that their opposite has to go AFK, obviously). Turning your back to someone while talking to them will be considered rude because you are gesturing that you exclude them from the conversation - be that with you or with a larger group.
8) Everyone is paranoid
Remember that when in a courtly/noble environment everyone is paranoid. They will constantly try to read more into your characters' action than they actually intended to put behind. It's part of the fun of the game, but be aware.
9) Self-importance
Your character is on Telvanni territory. Those people they are talking to can totally kill them and get away with it. Only very naive or very stupid characters would not be aware of that fact.
